More than half the families across our country break in the wake of difficulties and challenges. In fact, the USA is one of the leading countries in divorce rates. Most of us are aware of some of the problems or the common sinkholes that see families break up. Amid all these depressing facts, some families wade through all these difficulties and emerge intact. So what are their secrets? Here is a list of them:
Having the right priorities
It pays to know what your priorities are as partners in a marriage. What will come first among all things in the family? In successful families, the family comes first before anything else. The parents or spouses will place their family ahead of themselves. This means that they will not give up their family or kids for their job, relatives, desires, friends or possessions. All these things will take a back seat in favor of the spouse and children. When both partners and parents in a marriage share this notion, it sets a loving atmosphere for the family.
Most mates in a marriage don’t view it as a permanent union. In the backdrop of problems, they are quick to call it quits. This shows that they are not committed to their mates. They look at issues as an exit door as opposed to an opportunity to mushroom. When each mate is committed to a marriage, there will be a feeling of security with each one sense assured of the other partner’s loyalty.
In a marriage, the husband and wife should view it as “we” or “ours” instead of “me” and “mine.” Marriage is the inverse of singleness, and so the heart should also be married. When both mates are a team, it creates an intimacy in the two, and this gets the relationship working. If your marriage and subsequently your family is to succeed, you should see yourself as part of an important team.
If a family is to succeed, there should be no room for abusive language, sarcasm, and insults. When in strife, it is crucial that you treat your mate just as you would want to be treated. Discuss issues openly but ensure you do so peaceably. Don’t react to situations. Respond to them. How you handle difficulties may make or break your family.
When we make mistakes, our one desire is to be forgiven and that the other party doesn’t dwell on our error. This is no different in families. We should create room for error. The husband and wife should be quick to forgive each other, and when disciplining the kids, it shouldn’t be too rigid or too lax.
In conclusion, the mates in a family should also be willing to forgive one another and put the past to rest. No need reminding the other of their past mistakes. Families will also benefit if they are set on the right foundation.